Day 29--(Day 150): I love Snow!

Well, only when I get school off because of it. :) I actually HATE snow, but it's nice to have a day off. Now that I'm well rested and have had my caribou, I'm actually excited to go back to school tomorrow!!

Day 28--(Day 149): I love rehearsals

Today was my last middle school rehearsal...EVER. Wow. Now we've got four days of shows and then it will all be over. I'm cherishing these last few days with the middle schoolers...because as much as they drive me crazy, I love them. :)

Day 27--(Day 148): I love Eat, Pray, Love!

If you haven't ever read the book Eat, Pray, Love, you must read it! It is incredibly inspiring. I love it so much!

Day 26--(Day 147): I love Abby (still) :)

I know, I know. I've used that title before. But, I don't care!!! I love my friend Abby. She has this new blog (yay for her!) and the other day she posted some really awesome, nice things about me. So super sweet and totally made my day. :) http://abigailpersoon.blogspot.com/2012/02/i-girlfriends.html

Day 25--(Day 146): I love shoes!!!

Today I bought some awesome new shoes for just 6 dollars!!

Day 24--(Day 145): I love chipotle

There are fewer things that are better than a chipotle burrito! :)

Day 23--(Day 144): I love caribou!

Today went from bad to worse. Good thing I've got my caribou to make it all better!

Day 22--(Day 143): I love theatre

Today was one of the final rehearsals for the production I'm assistant directing. I can't believe that my 14th show with the middle school is almost over. :(

Day 21--(Day 142): I Love Politics

Today I met Congresswoman Michele Bachmann . Until today, I have hated (yes, I will admit it) Congresswoman Bachmann. I try to be very respectful and try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, but I haven't really felt that way toward Bachmann. But, today I actually got to meet her. It was surprisingly a wonderful experience. She was very nice to all of us and even stopped to take a picture with us.

So, even though I don't agree with her politics (or really any of her opinions), I actually sort of like her. She is a political rockstar. She's got the political world figured out, which is something I admire.

I guess this just reinforces my opinion that people should not be judged by their opinions. Just because you might disagree with someone, it doesn't make them a bad person, it doesn't even make them wrong. It just means that they have a different opinion. If we ask for respect, we must also give it.

Day 20--(Day 141): I Love Lunching!

Today I got to have lunch with three amazing people: Peg, Abby, and Angela! After our lunch, I dropped Angela off at the theatre and then got to see Peytie who is a wonderful person. :)

Oh, it was such a great day. :)

Day 19--(Day 140): I love being healthy

I'm feeling really sick today which is awful. But I really appreciate the fact that I am normally healthy. :) hopefully I will feel better soon.

Day 18--(Day 139): I Love Theatre!

I spent pretty much the whole day at the theatre today. What a blast!! I love being at the theatre and being with theatre people. :) I came home with a little bit of orange paint in my hair and purple paint on my fingers. There is nothing better.

Day 17--(Day 138): I Love Classical Music

Ok, I admit it: I'm a NERD. Especially when it comes to classical music and choral music. I could spend all day just listening to music.

I wanted to share one of my favorite pieces with you. This is Lacrimosa from Mozart's Requiem. The lyrics are translated as such:

Lacrimosa dies illa, qua resurget ex favilla judicandus homo reus. Huic ergo parce, Deus, pie Jesu Domine, dona eis requiem. Amen.

That day of tears and mourning, when from the ashes shall arise, all humanity to be judged. Spare us by your mercy, Lord, gentle Lord Jesus, grant them eternal rest. Amen.

Day 16--(Day 137): I Love Composition

Composing music is really difficult. Well, it's easy, but TEDIOUS. But, it is SO worth it when it comes together. Today, I worked on my choral composition and I'm so proud of how it is all coming together. :) More to follow about my piece....

Day 15--(Day 136): I Love Singing

Singing is amazing and it is my refuge. Today I got to sing at church and it was super fun! :)

Day 14--(Day 135): I Love LOVE!!!

Happy Valentine's Day!! Valentine's day is my favorite holiday because it's the one day everyone actually shows their love for others. :)

Love is all around.

Day 13--(Day 134): I Love Abby!

This is Abby. She's an awesome young lady (though I don't understand the snake). She started her very own blog over the weekend. Check it out: http://abigailpersoon.blogspot.com/

Day 12--(Day 134): I Love Eric Whitacre and Adele

I am so happy that two of my favorite artists won Grammy Awards tonight. Both Eric Whitacre and Adele received the award. :) Yay!!

Day 11--(Day 133): I love music

I really love music. It is my life. Today I spent a lot of time importing CDs into my iTunes. It's a long and tedious process, but it will be worth it. :)

Day 10--(Day 132) I love Chris

Today was a very, very difficult day.

Today is the anniversary of my friend Chris's death. The day actually started fine. I was a little more emotional than usual, but nothing too out of the ordinary. I even went and had coffee with a friend and we didn't even talk about Chris because I wasn't really feeling sad at that moment and didn't feel any particular need to bring it up.

But, when I got home I started feeling sick. Not because I'm actually sick or anything. I just felt like I was going to puke and I felt really dizzy. It was awful. I felt overwhelmed with emotion and tried calling a couple friends, looking for support. Unfortunately, no one answered. Feeling a little claustrophobic, I decided it might be best to get out of the house and drive somewhere. I followed my gut feeling to drive to church. I didn't go inside (didn't really want to see anyone), but I just sat in my car and to my relief, one of my friends returned my call. I talked to her for a little while and that made me feel a lot better. After that, I drove home. Now, I'm just fine.

I was really startled by this sudden mini-panic attack. I haven't had one since last April, so I was a little surprised. But, everything is okay now.

So, let me tell you a little about Chris. She was one of the most remarkable people I have ever been blessed to know. She basically taught me how to sing. I miss her so, so, so much.

At her funeral 3 years ago, we sang this song. Chris was very generous with her love and really made everyone feel welcome in her life and in her heart.

Day 9--(Day 131): I love to help my friends

Today, I'm feeling like a great person! I really feel like I've done things today to help people. I'll tell you about one of them. I had rehearsal for the middle school play after school today until 4:15. When rehearsal ended, I was chatting with the director and she couldn't find her keys. We looked all over the theatre and just couldn't find them. She told me I could go, but I didn't want to leave her there without knowing that she had a way to get home and to go pick up her kids. So, I stayed and we kept searching. We looked at the middle school and the high school and still couldn't find them. She was, of course, in a panic. I tried to stay calm and rational, but I was worried we wouldn't be able to find them. We walked down to the high school main office (where she hadn't even been near) and there they were sitting on the desk. Whew. I was so relieved and so was she.

I left feeling really great about helping her find them. It's amazing how great kindness can make a person feel. :)

Day 8--(Day 130): I Love Ellen

Ellen Degeneres is one of my favorite people. She's hilarious and she inspires me. She's not just a celebrity, she's a real person.

Also, she's gay. Some people think it's a big deal...like it makes her a bad person. SO NOT TRUE.

Some people don't like that she's the new spokesperson for JCPenney, but she's going to be a great spokesperson!

Day 7--(Day 129): I Love Politics!

I love politics and getting my opinion out and hearing other people's ideas. :) Tonight was the Minnesota caucus. It was super fun and awesome!

Day 5--(Day 127): I love travel

I actually love traveling. However, I am exhausted. I flew all by myself for the first time today.

Day 4--(Day 126): I Love...So Many Things.

I've been anticipating this day for a long time---for a few reasons.

1. Today was my first college audition. It went well, I think. :)

2. My mom and I went to see Sister Act on Broadway today. Super fun and cute show! Features some great music.

3. Today is the anniversary of my "grandma" Lorna's death. I watched Lorna breathe her last earthly breath. I actually witnessed her death. It was a blessing and a traumatizing experience. I love that I was able to share that moment with her and her family. That moment was the closest I have ever felt to anyone in my life and that made it even more difficult to let go. It was beautiful.

The traumatic part came after it happened. I don't talk about this part or write about it often because it is hard to discuss and difficult to verbalize. After this happened, I was in shock. I was numb. I didn't cry for like a week. I was so distraught and I didn't know how to handle it. I discussed it with many people, but I never really let out my feelings. One week later, I was sitting in the lobby of my school's theatre after school. I was all alone and I suddenly started hyperventilating and sobbing uncontrollably. I tried to take a few deep breaths and calm myself down, but I just couldn't regain control. After a minute of this, I stood up and walked to the bathroom, hoping that the movement would calm me down. It did and after that I was fine. Terrified, yes; but fine. Nothing like that had ever happened to me before, so I knew it must be connected to Lorna's death. I called a close friend and she calmed me down. About a month later, a similar thing happened. I was driving to a school near the hospice center where Lorna died and as I was taking the exit of the freeway (the same one that I had used the day Lorna died), I again started hyperventilating. It wasn't as bad this time, so I didn't feel the need to pull over. I got close to my destination, but I couldn't find the building or anywhere to park and the situation became very stressful. I began to cry. I tried to breathe and I was able to calm myself down. Once I did figure out where I was supposed to be, I sat in my car for a few minutes recovering. And then I was fine again.

I haven't had any other panic attacks since then, but the grief does come at weird times. But, that's pretty normal for me based on my other experiences with loss. And I still have dreams about Lorna a lot, but they aren't scary or bad, they're just memories of times I shared with her. Everything is ok now.

What I love about being there for Lorna's death is the strong connection I now have with her and her family. I've become very close with her husband Wendell and two of her granddaughters, Kirstin and Angela. I feel like they've really extended a lot of love to me and welcomed me into their hearts--just as Lorna did for me and so many others. And, as much as I love sharing my feelings about witnessing Lorna's death, no one can understand it as well as they do. Every week (just about) I see Wendell and always give him a big hug. We chat briefly about whatever is going on, but we don't say much and we don't really need to. Lorna's passing has created a special bond amongst all of us.

Lorna was a special lady. She was passionate about helping people and had room in her heart for everybody. She was also stubborn and opinionated---but, only because she cared so much. She was strong in her faith (something that I am still trying to learn from her) and showed courage in all she did.

As Lorna would say, "take your left hand and put it on your right shoulder and your right hand on your left shoulder and squeeze!-that's a hug from grandma!"

She'll always be with us.

Requiem.

Day 3--(Day 125): I love NYC!

I adore NYC! It is my home. :) Today we visited the 9/11 memorial. It was so cool.

Day 2--(Day 124): I love Art

New York City is my favorite place in the world. There is SO much to do! Today, we walked to the Museum of Modern Art and it was awesome! I got to see some really awesome stuff! I also learned that you're allowed to take pictures in the museum.

Day 1--(Day 123): Things I love

February is going to be all about things I love!! Today: I love music. Music is Life, Life is Music.